Wednesday, October 29, 2014

Taking my lumps

I have no excuse...I ate poorly this last weekend. I made sausage gravy and biscuits on Sunday....and ate liberally (SO DAMN GOOD!). And Saturday I ate an untold number of little smokies wrapped in crescent rolls...and a craft party. And I'm sure there was other food at some point. It wasn't pretty. So the gain is well deserved. At least I worked out on Saturday. Sunday...not so much.

I continue trying to get my exercise in. Also this week I purchased a "Active Link" thingy from WW because it was stupid cheap ($5 for the unit, $5 per month if you have eTools, which I already have for free through work), so now I'm using that...and now I'm realizing just how much activity I do NOT get during a work day. So...I'm now on a mission to go for a walk every couple of hours to change that. I LOVE bio-feedback. I'm sure I will move on to a fitbit or jawbone or something else soon because I know this little gadget isn't going to totally give me what I want...but for 5 bucks, I couldn't resist.

I've been down with some minor bug the last few days that gave me a low grade no exercise since Monday morning. I'm feeling better today. Hope to get a HIIT routine in after work tonight.

I'm going to attempt some major life changes in the coming weeks. Here we go:
  1. Break ambien dependency. Heaven help me.
  2. Achieve job satisfaction by trying to be the best at what I'm currently doing instead of longing to do something different.
  3. Help others in their weight loss efforts (I have a friend who is new to losing and really has no clue about calories, which BLOWS. MY. MIND. since I've been doing this since I was 12 and to me it is like breathing. Anyway...we are going to try to support each other in this process.
  4. Be more active with not only my daily hour of exercise, but also movement throughout the day.
That's all big stuff...the ambien one especially as it can EASILY impact all the others. I think I just need to quit cold turkey and accept the fact that I won't sleep well for a while...which in turn will affect my energy...leading to not wanting to exercise...and lower mood...affecting work performance. This could get really ugly. But I feel like I need to try. As it is right now I'm "scared" to try to go to sleep without it...that's not healthy.

I need to go focus on number 2 now...stop dinking around here. Later!


  1. Have you suffered from insomnia your whole life? I struggle myself, but have been afraid of taking any medicine. If you had to do it again, would you have even gotten on the Ambien?

  2. I actually started taking the Ambien to get me through problems I have with Restless Leg Syndrome. The way my RLS works is that it doesn't start till after midnight, at which point it wakes me up and then it doesn't stop till after 4am. The meds I had tried in the past all had varying issues but the theory with the ambien was that if I could just sleep through the start-up of the RLS, then I wouldn't care so much if it was happening. That actually worked excellent. But...because it is a sleeping pill, my body has now become dependent on it to fall asleep at if I don't take it I can tend to be up all night. So now, insomnia is, in fact, a side effect of taking ambien. Ambien is not truly meant to be taken for more than 6 months, but I've been on it since 2005 or so. Not only do I now have an unnatural "fear" of not taking it, but the dose I've been taking doesn't work consistently things are just bad all around. For the record...I did take it again last night. And will again tonight because I have two really big meetings with senior level people today and tomorrow and can't afford to be sleep deprived. I will try quitting on Friday.